This post was written by our great friend Sheri Rosenberg for her blog The World According to Sheri Maven were she posts regularly about music, style, and life at large. It seemed appropriate to re-post as I get back to reality after a wonderful vacation. I suspect September will be a crazy month, as it always is, so I appreciate the reminder now to be appreciative of what I have created, what I have experienced and what is still unknown. Thank you Sheri!
Good afternoon, Wednesday. I write as I sit on a plane half watching a chick flick after a couple of glasses of house red. Most people would think traveling to somewhere as cool as Barcelona is a great thing- and it is. But for some reason, this trip has me all fussed up. Because really, I just felt like staying put and panicked about leaving town. Plus, my insane issues with packing. A whole lifetime subscription really. Clearly I’ve watched “Roman Holiday” one too many times wherein I picture myself flouncing around Europe looking perfect. Flounces take up a lot of space. So do black tee shirts. I’ve learned this. So do all the lotions and potions one needs to achieve maximum transcon dewiness.
One thing to know about me- I like to blow shit up. Or so that’s the story I tell myself. I like to change things, buy things, switch things, cut things. I’m always feeling like everything in my life is in need of a primo shake-up- that whatever I’m doing is somehow not good enough, not cool enough, not “enough” enough. It’s a common ailment I know. That’s why I suppose advertising exists and employs so many of us- we need more things to be leaner, faster, sexier. We need to lose weight, gain muscle, nip and tuck. We need to buy, sell, and flip. We are culture largely obsessed with what we’re not, because supposedly from what they tell us, it’s much better someway or somewhere else. Hey I’m someone who pushes all of this lifestyle so I’m guilty, but even worse, I’m far from immune from its lure. I can never have enough, be enough, or do enough.
Why oh why must I be such a grass is greener type of girl?
I’m always questioning everything I do- from my career to my hair to whether or not I’m a good wife and dog mom. And after a month of complaining that my work was feeling dry and quiet, I get this big opp to work with some amazing people and go to Barcelona for 10 days on a good project. But meh, I’d rather stay home and go to barre class and watch “The Real Housewives” and have staring contests with Khan (I like to win). Yea, I know. I’m an absolute moron.
It’s because whatever is going on, I find a way to think it’s not what I should be doing. It’s an endless battle to fight this grass gazing wherein that other side looks mighty hot- I work hard on it every day but I’m someone who never appreciates what I have, and that’s got to change in both the short term and the long term. I feel like I’ve been talking about gardens and grass lately, but they are apt analogies for me right now so deal.
So ok- work is not always perfect. Marriage is not always perfect. My body is not always perfect. LIFE is almost never perfect. But what is perfect anyway when it’s measured against so many unattainable things? I realize that I’m exactly where I need to be, and that I need to be present in all of it- sure things will come up that are not to my liking or need to be tweaked, but really- I’m a lucky lady and I need to stop wishing everything that is isn’t.
More is not always the answer. Less may not be either. But I’m going to take a cue from fairy tales and revel in the fact that more often than not, things are just right. Just depends on how you look at them I suppose.
So off I go on another adventure- another airport, another round of Instagram photos, another round of work with some talented and cool people. I think part of the reason I freaked a bit about this trip (besides being insanely hormonal) and cried in the grocery today not just because they were playing “Leather and Lace”, but that I thought about Khan and David and realized I was taking them for granted of late as I moped around the house, and leaving them was harder than I expected this time, albeit for only 10 days. It made me realize how very much I have at home, but also that I need to be mindful that what I’m about to experience should be pretty kick ass too. I just needed to share that with all of my peoples out there who are grass is greener types. Just be present in your reality and that grass in your own yard should be just fine. Oh and ps- being cool with your life does not mean you’re settling- it just means you’re being present and not looking for something else every chance you get. Some of you enlightened types are like “duh” right now, but for the rest of us schmucks, we need a little reminder from time to time. A psychic type once told me it’s important for me to put my bare feet into the grass from time to time and get a little grounded. I’m gonna do that, and enjoy exactly where I am. Or at least I’m gonna try. Maybe if I can get that “just right” thing down my bag won’t be perpetually overweight when I check it. (clearly there’s something to too much baggage and the other stuff I was riffing about).
Cause that’s what’s up this airport philosophy kind of Wednesday in Newark. Yours, from the bright side and green enough grass. XO
Thank you Jimi Stine for help with the post.